Introverts, Homeschooling, RAD, Bullying, Sexual Surrogacy, and more: Sunday Bloggy stew

I've read some fantastic things on the internet the past couple weeks, and I think you should read them too! :)

I love answering questions about homeschooling. There's just one (frequent) question that drives me bonkers. Jamie at See Jamie Blog, does a bang up job of answering said annoying question here.

I don't really have anything to say about this next one, except read it: RAD–the anti-adoption sign

I found this one really encouraging when you're in the trenches, but I also think it's an indispensable read for those about to embark on adoption or foster care: Romanticizing adoption? Don’t do it!

As an introvert, there are certain challenges to motherhood...you know, like being around small people All. The. Time. This post really spoke to me: The Introverted Mother

and two from The Matt Walsh Blog:

I’m an introvert, and I don’t need to come out of my shell --loved this one. I felt like it was specifically written for the 3/5 of my household that happens to be introverted.

and

A letter from a bullied kid --great advice for any kid dealing with the jerks of the world.

From Her.meneutics: We Don't Need Sexual Healing --a great post on sexual surrogacy

If you only have time to read one post today, make it this one.

If you're at all connected to the adoption world, you're probably familiar with a certain Reuters article of late. I love this response.

Relationships: A Mess Worth Making... a rather brief disjointed review (as a stay at home/ home schooling mom, I'm juggling a few things as I blog)

Yesterday I finished reading Relationships: A Mess Worth Making by Timothy S. Lane and Paul David Tripp. I kind of think it should be required reading for all humans (well, part of it anyway, but I'll get to that later.)

I love my parents a lot, and they did a lot of things right in raising me, but they really missed it when it came to teaching me how to behave in a Christlike manner in relationships. A lot of that is probably because their parents never taught them. One of my parents has been wounded a lot in life and thinks it's better to avoid the pain and mess in relationships all together. But that not how we were made, and it's not what God intends for our lives. God uses our relationships with those around us to mold and shape us us, build us up, discipline us, and teach us to be more Christlike. Having never really been taught this, I tend to suck at relationships. Enter Relationships: A Mess Worth Making.

I've always maintained that relationships are always messy because we're all sinners. In many ways, this book is great guide for navigating all the mess. It illustrates how God uses relationships in our lives and how to behave in Godly way in relationships. It has biblical and practical ideas concerning how to behave when you've sinned or been sinned against, how to seek reconciliation, what mercy looks like, what forgiveness actually is, and how to approach others dealing with difficulty (there's a lot more too!) But though the books has teaches a lot about behavior and has great advice, that's not primarily what it's about. It's about your heart. Because at the heart of every relationship problem is a heart problem. Which brings me to an important warning about what this book is not...

This book is not a program to manipuating those around you so you can acheive the relationship of your dreams (let's just be honest here, that's exactly what most relationship books are). I fact on page 11 is says:

Skills and techniques appeal to us because they promise that relational problems can be fixed by tweaking our behavior without altering the bent of our hearts.

This book addresses your own sinful heart. As such, be warned, it's a convicting read!

I can say that though it's not a program for better relationships, reading Relationships: A Mess Worth Making has improved my relationships. It's made me evaluate my heart, God's desire for my interactions with others, and how to think about others. Because it's changed me, my realtionships have been changing.

I'm not going to tell you everything in the book, because I want you to read it. Specifically, I want you to read chapters 2, 3, 4, 5, 7, 8, 9, 10 and 12. Honestly the rest of the book seemed like filler, and rather unnecessary. But those chapters really cut to the heart, and teach so much--not only about relationships, but also about yourself and your relationship with God.

If you have parents, sibling, children, a spouse or friends, this book is for you. If you haven't any of those people in your life, this book is for you!

Relationships: A Mess Worth Making quotes C.S. Lewis several times, and I'm going to conclude with one here to give you a little food for thought:

Encouragement

My Sunday school lesson today was based on the following, and I found it so encouraging, I had to share with the rest of the blogosphere :) The Strange Ways of Our Wonderful Builder October 31, 2001 by John Piper topic: The Sovereignty of God Was Christ building his church on September 11? The reason this question rises is the absolute, universal authority behind Jesus' promise in Matthew 16:18, "I will build my church." Who said this? The one who spoke and fevers departed (Luke 4:39), trees withered (Mark 11:21), demons obeyed (Mark 1:27), Satan was plundered (Mark 3:27), wind ceased (Mark 4:41), the dead were raised (Luke 7:14; John 11:43), thousands ate from five loaves and two fish (Matthew 14:19-21), and water became wine (Matthew 14:26) or a walkway for his feet (Matthew 4:46). This power over heaven and earth and hell is explicitly related to Christ's missionary commitment to build his church. "I will build my church and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it" (Matthew 16:18). "All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Go therefore and make disciples of all nations" (Matthew 28:18-19). In other words, Jesus is firmly committed to use his power over heaven and earth and hell to make disciples. No event in the universe which Christ produces or permits is outside his purpose to build his church. But it doesn't look that way. His ways are not our ways. He seldom moves in a straight line from A to B. The way up is almost always down. The convoluted path of God in redemptive history brings Paul to these words, "Oh, the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are his judgments and how inscrutable his ways!" (Romans 11:33). For example, was Christ triumphantly building his church when he was killed by his enemies and buried for three days? Jesus answers: "Destroy this temple, and in three days I will raise it up" (John 2:19). "I lay down my life for the sheep. And I have other sheep that are not of this fold. . . . No one takes it from me . . . I have authority to lay it down, and I have authority to take it up again" (John 10:15-16, 18). In other words, what looked like failure and tragedy was total authority - plus the purchase of "other sheep." By the worst sin that has ever been committed - the murder of the Son of God - Jesus was triumphantly building his church. Was Christ building his church when the apostle Paul was imprisoned in Rome? Paul answers: "What has happened to me has really served to advance the gospel, so that it has become known throughout the whole imperial guard and to all the rest that my imprisonment is for Christ. And most of the brothers, having become confident in the Lord by my imprisonment, are much more bold to speak the word without fear" (Philippians 1:12-14). I am "bound with chains as a criminal. But the word of God is not bound!" (2 Timothy 2:8). In other words, what looked like defeat was Christ's strange design for victory. Was Christ building his church in China when the Communists triumphed in 1949, ending 150 years of Protestant missionary presence? "The growth of the Church in China [since then] has no parallels in history. . . . Mao Zedong unwittingly became the greatest evangelist in history. . . . [He] sought to destroy all religious 'superstition' but in the process cleared spiritual roadblocks for the advancement of Christianity. Deng [Xiaoping] reversed the horrors inflicted by Mao and in freeing up the economy, gave more freedom to the Christians. . . . [Today] the Church of the Lord Jesus is larger than the Communist Party of China" (Patrick Johnstone, Operation World). So then, was this all-ruling Christ building his church on September 11? I answer with questions that are not merely hypothetical. What if Christ saw the planes heading for the destruction of thousands and the upheaval of nations? What if, at the same time, he saw 200 million Hindu untouchables in India, the Dalits? What if he saw that his centuries-long work of dislodging them from Hindu bondage was about to come to consummation in our day and they were contemplating embracing Islam or possibly Christianity or Buddhism? And what if he foresaw that this Islam-related terror against civilians in New York would have the mass effect of tilting millions of Dalits away from Islam toward Christ? What if he withheld his power from stopping the terrorists because (along with 10,000 other hope-filled effects) he had a view to the everlasting life of millions of untouchables in India? And if not this, perhaps my grandchildren will tell a better story of sovereign grace. Joining Jesus with you on the Calvary road, Pastor John © Desiring God Permissions: You are permitted and encouraged to reproduce and distribute this material in any format provided that you do not alter the wording in any way and do not charge a fee beyond the cost of reproduction. For web posting, a link to this document on our website is preferred. Any exceptions to the above must be approved by Desiring God. Please include the following statement on any distributed copy: By John Piper. © Desiring God. Website: desiringGod.org --------------------------------------------------------------------------------